Everyone Wants to Be Pig Feed Part Two

12/7/2025

Look at her face—Joan’s rage meter is about to max out: “Usually I mind my own business, but damn, they actually dared to mess with me first? That takes guts!”

Joan smiled softly to soothe her: “So, what exactly happened? Spill it.”

“Alright.” Jill Young plopped herself down at the edge of Joan’s embroidered bed, grabbed a teacup, took a sip to wet her throat, and switched into storyteller mode: “The first time, it went like this…”

[First incident: Framing]

The time: Day three of palace life, in the daytime.

The place: Inner courtyard of Simone's Residence.

Here’s what happened: Seeing Joan so focused every day, Jill Young decided to get her act together too. Normally she’s restless and can’t sit still, but lately she’s buckled down and started working hard. On this particular day, she carefully pondered the essence of her Iron-Gold Body, jotting down the techniques for Iron Script, Gold Script, and Iron-Gold Body martial arts on paper to help her think.

As Jill Young’s research deepened, the densely packed words on the paper turned into line diagrams, then into strange symbols—proof she’d completed the initial breakdown of all three techniques. Sometimes she’d ponder for ages, sometimes she’d add a few strokes or erase some parts. The symbols on the paper multiplied or shrank: sometimes her brush flew across the page, filling it with dragon-like script, other times she’d cross out almost everything, leaving just a handful of symbols. This was her careful study of the Iron-Gold Body, working to upgrade its quality step by step.

Though Jill Young is usually hyperactive, once she really buckles down, she can focus like nobody’s business—soon she was totally absorbed in her work at Simone’s place.

That’s when a few palace maids showed up.

“Palace maids?” Joan had already guessed something: “Are they the attendants of some other concubine?”

“Yeah, it was Lady Ruby’s maid—you know, that concubine whose name I can never remember. She picked the exact moment Simone was out, came in and started chatting nonsense with me about the art of being a maid and all that. Like I care! I was about to send her packing when I noticed one of her buddies acting shady, sneaking around Simone’s room trying to hide something. She thought I wouldn’t notice, but I saw it all. Here, look—this is what she stashed.” Jill Young put a brocade box on Joan’s desk: “See? This thing right here.”

Joan eyed the brocade box. It was closed, so of course you had to check what’s inside.

To see what’s inside, you’ve got to open it.

And to open it, you need to use your hands.

Joan’s gaze stayed steady, her breath calm. Outwardly, she showed no sign of anything amiss—she’d been preparing since the moment Jill Young walked in. Now, she quietly drew a breath, reached out, and opened the brocade box. Her fair, delicate hand looked even more radiant than usual, smooth as warm jade.

Inside the brocade box was a stack of letters. Joan picked up one and couldn’t help but laugh: “Such a petty trick—fake evidence, trying to frame Simone for having a secret affair and exchanging love letters with a man outside the palace. No wonder there was a big fuss here a few days ago, people searching everywhere. The poetry’s not bad, but the scheme is just… way too obvious.”

“Joan, you’re way too polite—‘obvious’? It’s straight-up brainless!” Jill Young ignored Joan’s hand, clearly annoyed. “But hey, these days, manners don’t matter. If you can grab the goods, you win. The so-called civilized types can’t compete with these simple, crude little stunts. And that’s not even the dumbest one! If you think this scheme had a bit of ‘strategy’ to it, wait till you hear about the second frame-up. That one was shameless! Here’s what happened…”

[Second incident: Frame-up]

The time: Night of the fourth day in palace life.

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