"Wait, Ethan Zhang."
As I walked into the courtyard, Lydia Howard called out from behind me. I stopped. (Lydia Howard: surname included for clarity)
"Since you don't have the slightest longing for that girl, I'll find a way myself."
"Since I knew you were coming, of course I also knew where Rufina went."
I stopped, turned around, and glared at Lydia Howard.
Rufina Howard's birth was... unnatural. Never, in all of history, has such a thing happened. The Prime Ancestor was born into our Howard family—none of us expected it. I searched for Rufina Howard for seven years. What mother wouldn't yearn for her own child?
I quietly watched Lydia Howard, but as for what she said about missing her daughter, I didn't believe it for a moment.
Back in the living room, I took a sip of tea. I let it linger on my tongue, searching for anything strange. Only after a moment did I swallow, unease prickling at the back of my mind.
Seven years ago, I found where Rufina was and negotiated endlessly with the three Guardians. Only then did they finally agree.
"Three?"
I stared in astonishment, eyes wide.
"There were three. I refused to let the Eastern Emperor (one of the Four Guardians, see glossary) get involved, because I calculated that if he learned of the matter, he couldn't keep it secret. After the negotiations succeeded, I posed as a villager, acting as Rufina Howard's grandmother and teaching her Yin-Yang arts."
"Why didn't you tell her you were her mother?"
"There was no need. I made an agreement with the Three Guardians that when Rufina Howard turned eighteen, she'd meet the right person, have a child, and continue the Howard bloodline. After that, we and the Three Guardians would have nothing more to do with each other."
With a loud bang, I slammed my hand on the table. I was thoroughly furious now.
"She's not your toy. If you try to force that girl..."
"There's no need to worry. Nowadays, there are test-tube babies. All we need is a sample from Rufina's body, find a suitable male, and I can be the surrogate. This way, the Howard bloodline can continue."
I stared at Lydia Howard, dumbfounded.
"Where is it? Let's go now."
I immediately stood up, impatience boiling in my chest as I stared at Lydia Howard.
"This is where your longing comes in. Even ghosts have things they yearn for. For centuries, countless human desires have intertwined, giving birth to that entity. Our Howard family once made a pact with it: if we saved it, it would protect us for generations. Every Howard family head performed rituals to ease the Thought Ghost's pain, but this time, none of those rituals worked. Tormented day and night, the Thought Ghost finally became twisted, fixated on devouring my unborn child."
At that time, Lydia Howard had already sensed something was wrong with the Thought Ghost, who hid in the shadows, staring at her growing belly. The whole family noticed and tried to help, but negotiations failed, so they sealed the Thought Ghost away.
But on the day Rufina Howard was born, the Thought Ghost still came. Fortunately, the presence of the Four Guardians allowed Rufina to escape disaster. The Thought Ghost had no power, only a maddening obsession to devour Rufina, and that obsession was the source of its strength.
Hearing this, I finally understood. Nüwa had said that only longing could save Rufina Howard. But now, as a ghost, even if I longed for her, it was useless.
"Like repels like, opposites attract, huh?" I muttered. Lydia Howard nodded.
I muttered to myself. Lydia Howard nodded.
As a ghost, I realized the one who took Rufina Howard belonged to the Yin side as well. No matter how much I longed for her, it was useless. What was needed was a human's longing. Lydia Howard, sitting before me, felt nothing for her own daughter.
"In our Yin-Yang family, we believe in the transformation of Yin and Yang. I have a way to turn your ghostly longing into human longing. When the time comes, you'll need to find a way to suppress that thing yourself."
I responded with an "Oh," and nodded.
White talismans fluttered through the air. Lydia Howard sat in the courtyard, the talismans swirling around her as if they were alive.
Gradually, the talismans settled around Lydia Howard. She opened her eyes and stood up.
"Tomorrow night at midnight is the best time. Please wait patiently, Ethan Zhang."
I sat in the courtyard, watching the old woman scatter colored powder carefully around. Gradually, the powder formed a strange symbol. What struck me as odd was that, after watching for a long time, not a single breeze stirred.
Only now did I realize that everything around me was in a delicate balance of Yin and Yang, constantly complementing each other. As night fell, the daytime chill vanished, replaced by a restless heat.
When morning came and the sun rose, it should have been warm, but instead, the place grew cold.
All I could think about was Rufina Howard. I'd seen many parents, including my adoptive parents—they treated me as their own, cared for me, and that's how I grew up and lived many years as an ordinary person.
I thought of Old Moe and Helen Lane, Rachel Lan's mother. For Rachel Lan, they did so much—everything they did was out of love. But the woman sitting in the house behind me, my own mother, I couldn't see a trace of love in her actions.
She was just a tool, teaching Rufina Howard only to continue the family line, and now, in this situation, helping me only to save Rufina Howard.
I patted my head. It was already noon, and the chill had deepened—even as a ghost, I felt it to my bones.
Finally, around 11 p.m., I sat in the courtyard as Lydia Howard had instructed, right in the center of the strange symbol. Lydia Howard changed into a colorful long robe and sat across from me, already chanting under her breath.
"Ethan Zhang, remember, don't think about anything else—just recall the happiest moments with Rufina."
Brilliant, multicolored lights flared up around me. I closed my eyes.
From our very first meeting, when I helped Yu Xiaoting and first met Rufina Howard—she used a spell to embarrass me in public and someone filmed it. I laughed as I remembered.
Later, at my parents' place, in the Wisteria Complex, I saw Rufina Howard lingering by the barbecue stand, wanting skewers but short on money. I bought her some, and she taught me about formations. I managed to defeat the Evil Ghost that haunted me since childhood.
When we faced the Ghost Rakshasa, that girl followed us into the Ghost Realm without hesitation. More and more memories of Rufina Howard flooded my mind—tears and laughter, joy and sorrow. I opened my eyes.
My whole body was wrapped in colored light. Lydia Howard frowned as I looked up.
"Girl, if you can feel it, come back soon. Maybe the one who misses you most isn't me, but Red Hair. Didn't you say you wanted to save him? But things aren't done yet—where do you want to go?"
Suddenly, Lydia Howard opened her eyes.
"Get ready, that thing is coming."
I immediately stood up. A cloud of black mist rose before my eyes, just ten meters away. I could sense the unique aura of the Thought Ghost.
"Heh, Ethan Zhang, it's over. That girl was delicious—I've already devoured her."
In a flash, I was at the Thought Ghost's side. The beauty in my hand split him in two. He screamed. I held Rufina Howard—her body was icy cold and unconscious.
"Girl, wake up, wake up..."
I shouted, but there was no sign of life in Rufina Howard. Behind me, the Thought Ghost laughed, forming a human shape and wiping his mouth.
"Delicious. I feel much better after eating that girl."
I stared quietly at Rufina Howard. Ghost energy surged out of me. In that instant, anger twisted my face.
"Give her back..."
I said coldly.
"Heh, I've already eaten her. How could I give her back? I've claimed that girl—her longing is mine. As for her body and soul, I don't need them. I've told you before, Ethan Zhang. Well, what now? Let's talk cooperation..."
"Give her back."
I stared fiercely at the Thought Ghost, gripping its neck tightly.
Murderous intent surged, turning my eyes blood-red. Black energy instantly filled the space around us.
"Give her back."
I roared in anger. In an instant, the Thought Ghost dissolved into a wisp of black mist, slipping from my grasp.
With a thunderous crash, I pinpointed the Thought Ghost within the mist, seized its neck again, and slammed it to the ground.
"Once something is eaten, it can't be spat out, Ethan Zhang. Give up. I didn't expect you to be so strong, but you still can't defeat me. Kill that woman over there..."
Suddenly, the thought to kill Lydia Howard surfaced in my mind. The Thought Ghost, whom I gripped tightly, laughed coldly.